written by Daniel Manning
directed & produced by Mischa Stanton
[[SFX: tape start]]
SALLY GRISSOM (SG): Diary of Sally Grissom, June 24th, 1953. Good spirits today. Settling into more of a rhythm. Roberts is back home and working herself to death, as per usual, but the regular card games have resumed, and ever since she revealed unto me her grand plot of resurrection vis-a-vis Nikhil Sharma, it feels like she’s on my team again, more now than it has in a lot of years. I mean, don’t get me wrong, she’s still working hard to promote the agenda of a less-than-upstanding top secret government agency, and it’s very possible she only saved Nikhil to use him as a resource to make up for the fallen Blackroom, but at least she’s being open and honest about it. To me. As… as far as I know.
Speaking of Nikhil, it is amazing to finally have him as part of my life again, getting to know him for real, being able to sit down and have a meal together. Like, ok for example, there’s the way he holds a fork, I’ve never seen anyone else that does this. He holds it like a pencil. Like he’s gonna spear a piece of broccoli and then smear it on a piece of paper in his chicken-scratch doctor’s handwriting. It’s just… I dunno. It’s nice to have the time to notice the little things.
We’re even bonding over trying to crack this hard drive we got from Partridge. Well, I say hard drive. It looks like a sort of cobbled-together mess made out of a hard drive on a chip, and some other parts. I think I can spot a miniature version of Partridge’s Asynchronous Processing Unit? He must have been working on it for a while… Um. Anyway. Since Petra gave it to me I haven’t had any luck decrypting it. Not that I was ever really a computer whiz. Hardware’s all well and good but software always did me in, back when that was a thing. I asked Nikhil to take a look, but he’s even worse than I am, give or take some ODAR field agent basic training. Ah well, I’ll crack it sooner or later.
After I found out the whole plot, hearing that he’d been shacked up in secret for years just to keep me safe… I was worried he’d be different. And he is. From the few days I knew him, anyway. He’s more… reserved. More guarded. Focused, almost, though on what I’m not entirely sure. And especially now that his former boss from the future is here running ODAR in the present day, which also kind of nullifies the reason Roberts revived him in the first place, since she knows the exact same intel about future Soviet plans as he does. Possibly even more so. So now that Nikhil’s just kind of here anyway, and we still have to keep his life a secret… it seems like he’s working on something else. And it’s still a little awkward between the whole lot of us for me to ask. And my usual move is to barge in and ask anyway, but… it’s a very fragile situation. Probably better to take it slow.
It’s just really nice to just have friends again. They’re all ODAR people, one way or another, but still. Makes life feel a little more normal. A little smoother, y’know? Though of course, it’d be even nicer if I could get them in the same room with each other. Give it time, Grissom.
And, in the interest of letting my life be smoother by escaping the day-to-days of ODAR R&D life! The classes are finally picking up traction. I wasn’t sure when I first sent the word around, but I figured a town like Point-of-Exile, with its unique abundance of electrical power and technological conveniences, would probably attract the curiosity of more than a few ladies. I’ve got about 15 of them now, who come on Friday nights to learn electrical engineering at the rec center. This week we’re doing doing real circuits! I love the hands-on stuff. I’m also working on a name for us. “Grissom’s Gizmo Gals.” What do you think? ...yeah, I dunno. I’m still workshopping it.
[[SFX: radio tuning; Sally's Gizmo Gals exiting the classroom]]
SG: Of course! Tell Myrtle I’ll drop over a recording of this week’s lecture with a tub of soup, alright? Tell her to feel better.
JEANETTE EVERWORTH (JE): Hi, Sally, could I bend your ear a moment?
SG: Hey Jeanette, what’s on your mind?
JE: Actually… there are a lot of people, and…
SG: Sure, no problem. Let me…
[[SFX: Sally shuts off the recorder; radio tuning; the diner]]
JE: Thank you so much for meeting me.
SG: Of course! Anything for one of my girls. What can I do you for?
JE: I’ll cut right to it, I suppose. You work for the government, right?
SG: Um… yeah, I do.
JE: I’ve just seen you drive up the hill to the department of whoever you’re supposed to be.
SG: That’s fine, I’m just not allowed to talk about what I do–
WAITSTAFF (WS): Hi, welcome to Lou’s Cafe, can I get you something?
SG: [dismissively] Hi, couple coffees. Thanks.
WS: Oh, my...
[[SFX: Waitstaff leaves]]
JE: No, I just wanted to know about my niece. Carrie Everworth, do you know her?
SG: Can’t say I do.
JE: Oh, well, I’m from Greeley, you see, and that’s where my brother lives, he raised his kids out there, and his oldest, Carrie, she got recruited–she’s real smart, you know–she got recruited by the government, and she’s not allowed to say where but she moved out here, so I figured that it’s probably…
SG: Yeah, that’s probably us. That, or… Let’s just assume it’s us.
[[SFX: Waitstaff reappears]]
WS: Here you go, girls.
[[SFX: Waitstaff sets down two mugs and pours coffee; Sally and Jeanette wait tensely for her to finish]]
WS: ...Well, if you need anything, just holler.
[[SFX: Waitstaff leaves]]
JE: She’s been living with me the past couple weeks, and I’ve really appreciated the help around the house after Lyle passed on, but about a week ago she just up and moved out with scarcely more than a word!
SG: Oh. How unlike her?
JE: She told me she was being assigned something important, but I didn’t think you all were the kind that likes to travel abroad.
SG: It depends, but you know I can’t say much. National security, et cetera.
JE: Could you maybe, just… I don’t know… can you check on her? Make sure she’s alright?
SG: Yeah, I could take a look, send out some feelers.
JE: Could you? Carrie is the only family I see outside of Thanksgiving and Christmas. I’d really appreciate it.
[[SFX: radio tuning; Tonya's office]]
TONYA LEMARTINE (TLM): Well. then what can you do?
ESTHER ROBERTS (ER): We just don’t have the perspective we had anymore. We need to organize the timeline better.
TLM: I believe I’ve made myself perfectly clear.
ER: You have, and I really appreciate your patience during the changing of the guard. But I’m still trying to catch up on everything I missed, and there’s a lot to get a handle on–
TLM: You’re right: I have been patient. Obviously, your situation is unique, and because you’re such a valuable asset I’m willing to give you a little wiggle room. But unfortunately the world does not stop spinning just because you can’t catch a break.
TLM: Tonya, please. I really do insist.
ER: Tonya. We still don’t know the precise scope of Hank Cornish’s operation. The security audit alone locked my staff out of their offices for five whole days.
TLM: I hope you’re not suggesting that the measures we took to ensure that our organization was free of further Soviet influence were redundant?
ER: Obviously I don’t think that. But the resources I have access to today have shrunk dramatically since a year ago, and the task has only ballooned. I’m creating a coherent threat response to the Soviets with one hand tied behind my back and blindfolded.
TLM: If you aren’t up to the task, I could just–
ER: No! I’m just coming to you as someone who I will have supposedly asked to handle this specific situation: how are we supposed to keep any sort of useful frame of reference when tectonic shifts in history are happening under our feet every day?
TLM: You can’t do this work without the Blackroom, it seems.
ER: Our infrastructure was built entirely off the presumption that we’d have the Blackroom to fall back on. If we’re ever going to get a leg up, we need some kind of alternative. We’re an intelligence agency, and we’re sorely lacking in intelligence.
[[SFX: Tonya pulls out a desk drawer. She sets a pile of folders on the desk.]]
ER: What’s that? The file marked “Blackroom Replacements, Ideas A-M?”
TLM: It’s actually labeled Nonlinear Chronology Management Proposals, and it only covers A-J. Let’s have a look, shall we?
[[SFX: radio tuning]]
SG: Diary of Sally Grissom, July 2nd, 1953. Guess what came in today? That’s right, it’s Carrie Everworth’s file! You know the lengths I had to go through to get it? I know Roberts is probably not gonna file another inessential document request–she learned that lesson pretty hard recently–so I went to Bridget Chambers, someone else who probably owes me a favor, and she told me… that it wasn’t her department. Is she not in Human Resources on the side or something? I don’t know why I thought that. So I asked Petra if she could, like, steal it or whatever but turns out she already had the file there for me and requested I leave her alone to practice her jiu jitsu or whatever. It’s real spooky how she does that. Handy, but spooky. Anyway so I didn’t actually end up having to go through a lot of hoops but I’m sure Petra had to do some cool action spy stuff to get it, so, like, many Bothans or whatever. The point is, I have the file.
[[SFX: Sally opens up the file and leafs through]]
Let’s see here… Oh, there’s a note from Petra. “No Bothans were harmed in the unlawful removal of this document.” Heh. Nice. “Return this to the mail slot for “SYLVIA PUREBOOT” by 3pm tomorrow.” Who the hell is Sylvia Pureboot? “P.S. YOUR DIARIES SMELL LIKE FARTS LOVE NIKHIL” Hah! What a nerd. Anyway, let’s have the rest of it. Okay, Carrie Everworth, born 1924 in Greeley, CO. Blah-dee-dah, science and language award… recruited by ODAR… assigned to a… what’s this? There’s a… oh that is a LOAD! The gall of these people! I am SO PI–
[[SFX: radio tuning; Tonya's office]]
SG: Director LeMartine?
TLM: Dr. Grissom, so nice to have you back in my office again.
SG: Ha haa I know, right? Yeah, I’m real sorry I had to keep rescheduling. I’ve just been slammed, you know? Burning the midnight oil? Just got a lot of… stuff, you know, everything with the Russians and stuff?
TLM: Of course. You’re busy, I understand that. I will admit though, I’ve been disappointed. It’s nice to be able talk to the only other person in town from 20█.
SG: Yeah, right? Isn’t this wild? It’s like Back to the goddamn Future out here.
TLM: Sorry, I don’t really watch movies. That’s the flying car one with Eric Stoltz?
SG: Yeah it’s, uh, it takes place in the 1950s.
TLM: I’m sure those filmmakers used period-accurate costumes and sets. Being here must remind you of that movie.
SG: Yeah, it… it does. So you’re really from 20█?
TLM: I am. Born 19█. Started at ODAR 20█, became acting director by 20█, and then relocated to 1953. Obviously, I come from a history where ODAR operates well after WWII, so we don’t share identical histories, but I’d wager nobody holds a history quite as unique as yours.
SG: Well, we’ve all got the same history before 1943, you know?
TLM: So, you actually scheduled this meeting in advance, which I have on good authority is a rarity for you, so I assume you have something to ask me.
SG: I’ve, um, just got a few questions about our communication protocols in the future. What comes next after the Blackroom.
TLM: Of course. As I’m sure you know, without Anthony Partridge’s sacrifice, we can’t communicate with our past and future as easily, so we’re looking at implementing some alternatives.
SG: What kind of alternatives?
TLM: One of the bonuses of being from the future–as I’m sure you’ve noticed–is that we’ve actually had a great deal more time to experiment with the Timepiece than you have with your limited 1950s vantage.
SG: Rub it in, why don’t you.
TLM: One of the fruits of our labor is a project called Outpost. We’re essentially repurposing the initial Blackroom concept of a communications hub suspended in a null-time field for field operatives to synchronize with.
SG: If you don’t mind my asking, how is that going to be... you know, staffed?
TLM: Looking for a career change, Dr. Grissom? I didn’t think you were the type.
SG: No, it’s not that. You know, I was just wondering what the deal was. I know with Partridge he was in a rough spot, and I wanted to know if you’ve got a person, or what…
TLM: Oh. You’re talking about Carrie Everworth.
SG: Yeah. Jeanette chased me down after class last Friday.
TLM: I should have been more worried about her aunt in your class. Virtue #4 of the ODAR Field Manifesto: a critical eye toward coincidence.
SG: So you’re just gonna send her to the same black you sent Partridge to, huh?
SG: He languished there for god knows how long and died alone and I’m not gonna let you do that again to someone else! She’s just a kid, LeMartine.
TLM: The Outposts are not the same as Anthony Partridge’s prison, and I really wish you’d withhold judgment and hold your tongue until you actually know anything about it.
SG: Oh? Do I not know what the fuck I’m talking about? Because I brought examples. Exhibit A: “The Outpost project replicates the functionality of the Anchor Point Chronology Observation Relay Outpost aka Blackroom on a larger scale with a similar personnel cost.”
TLM: I understand your concern, Sally, but let me be clear with you here: we need manpower in 1943. We need people on the ground. It’s where we’re most vulnerable. It’s the front line of defense against a world that you wouldn’t recognize as your own.
SG: So you’re just gonna, eh, more or less kill a few people of your own, just because “It’s for the war, Jerry!”
TLM: Yes! People die in war, Sally. Are you saying that by sending soldiers into battle, knowing they might not come home, that I am committing murder by sending them there? Ha! My word! You’ve figured it out! You’ve discovered the grand contradiction! We have to tell the New York Times about this! We’ll have world peace in a month.
SG: That doesn’t make it right.
TLM: I respect that your life was stolen from you, and it’s a wound that may truly never heal, but you cannot deprive another from making the same choice.
SG: You can’t in good faith ask someone to choose to live out the rest of their life alone in a small dark room.
TLM: Once again, I really wish you’d wait to comment on matters of which you remain woefully ignorant. The Outpost isn’t operated by somebody in a CAGE.
SG: Well… so then what is it?
TLM: While there is a null-time component to the Outpost, it’s operated remotely by an agent stationed nearby in late 1943 and 1944.
SG: That’s not possible. That shouldn’t be possible. There’s the quantum uncertainty… thing.
TLM: Well, since I’m sure you know about “the quantum uncertainty… thing” you also know that in the coming decades you yourself will discover that CAGEs emit a very faint amount of radiation back into the outside world, and, of course, that that radiation can be manipulated to transmit meaningful data. So please, tell me more about what shouldn’t be possible.
SG: No, hold on, I’ve never measured that before–
TLM: Harder to see it in the early days. Too much background interference. But now that I’ve brought back documents outlining the basic principles, I’m confident we can get it up and running.
SG: ...If you can operate it on the outside, you don’t need someone to do it in 1943. You don’t need to ask someone to give up their life for this.
TLM: You seem very sure of that.
SG: I’ll prove it to you. Give me a week, and I’ll design something that will do everything you can get out of this thing without sending anybody back. Listen, you’ll be able to run this thing from your desk. Well, maybe not literally your desk but–
TLM: I understand hyperbole, thanks. You’ve got seven days, Sally. Hop to it.
[[SFX: radio tuning; the diner, Sally sucks on a milkshake.]]
SG: “And I have a straw, and it reaches acrooooooooooooss the room…”
SG: Nothing. It’s nothing. So I get that whatever, she’s got a fancy quantum indicator that can blah blah blah monitor CAGE radiation blah condense an uncertainty state blah blah blah parse the signal to avoid a race hazard, blah blah blah, but where is she getting all this stuff?
ER: Well, she’s from 20█, she’s got this whole… barrelful of answers. Technology, operational procedures, systems analysis. Not everything we could ask for, but certainly a lot more than we had.
SG: Sounds suspicious.
ER: A woman arriving from the future with advanced technology? That’s suspicious?
SG: You know what I mean. She’s from ODAR. They’re all the same.
ER: So everyone from ODAR is equally untrustworthy?
SG: No! Obviously. There’s you, Gaines, Chambers, Petra’s not but she’s more or less a good person I think…
ER: And you?
SG: Very funny.
ER: Sally, I… I’m not making light of treason here, believe me, but you kind of did join an insurrection against this organization that almost certainly would have led to death and destruction on a widespread scale.
SG: Science is still out on that one–
SG: But I know what you mean. ODAR and I have a troubled relationship. Maybe I’m just unnerved that somebody from 20█ has answers that I don’t. But do you think I should trust her, though?
ER: I wouldn’t trust anybody. But take my advice with a grain of salt I guess, I was recently framed by rogue Soviet agents operating under my nose, and the only thing that spared me the noose was that it would be too expensive to train my replacement.
SG: Hey, I could do your job no sweat! Just gotta… not funny? Ok.
ER: Was she really that amenable to you? She just listened to your concerns and… agreed with you?
SG: Terrifying, right?
ER: Downright arcane. I mean, if she really didn’t want to hear your side or whatever, she didn’t have to.
SG: I just… maybe I can save her.
ER: Who, that girl? Your student’s daughter?
SG: Niece. She works for us, but if they send her to Philadelphia 1943 they’ll never see each other again.
ER: Sounds like you’ve got a lot on your plate, then.
SG: Is it possible that LeMartine actually gives a flying fuck what I think?
ER: Well there’s one way to find out.
[[SFX: radio tuning; Sally giving a presentation]]
SG: So with the adaptations to the Uncertainty Condenser mechanism that I outlined on page six, alongside the revised antenna placement here...
[[SFX: slides clicking over]]
SG: ...here, and here inside the station can increase the effective range from 18 months from the origin point to five or six years.
SG: As per my initial proposal in the abstract, with the range improvements and the human involvement of AVENUE in ‘46 with OBSERVER and ECONOMIC in ‘48, it’s possible to crew the Outpost with only folks contemporary to us and agents we already have in the field.
TLM: You’ve done your research.
SG: So much. So, so, much. I’ve gotten really good at this. If you’ll turn to the tables in the back, in the appendix, you’ll see that you can redirect approximately fifteen thousand dollars quarter over quarter over the lifespan of the project.
TLM: How did you… get such accurate budget predictions for this?
SG: I picked up a bit when I did the budget for FY1947 because there was literally nobody else there who could do it, and then I did a lot of guessing and a lot of math, like, Partridge math… and I asked Roberts.
TLM: Fair enough.
SG: So, what do you think? Are we gonna save Carrie, or what?
TLM: I think what you’ve showed me today is the best justification for rethinking my plans for the Outpost.
SG: Wait, really?
TLM: I’m not wasting any time getting the Outpost set up, but I’m definitely going to take this data into account. It’s more efficient, and on the upside we can keep a few more agents’s families intact. Not bad, Dr. Grissom.
SG: Holy shit. This is the most human thing ODAR has ever done.
[[SFX: radio tuning; Sally's house, rain outside. Someone knocks at the door.]]
[[SFX: door opens]]
SG: Jeanette! How… how are you?
JE: [crying] I got… I got a letter from Carrie.
SG: That’s great news! Is she moving back in with you?
SG: Oh my god, I’m so sorry, come in.
[[SFX: door closes]]
SG: Hey, hey, sit down.
JE: I know you said you pulled some strings but, she said they’re transferring her halfway around the world.
SG: I did! I thought I…
JE: Do you wanna hear the letter?
SG: Uhm, sure. If you don’t mind.
JE: It’s postmarked Philadelphia.
JE: “Dear Aunt Jeannie,
“I am sorry I haven’t written or called in some time. I‘ve been very busy with my new job (as I am sure you remember) and I wanted to send you one last letter before I set off on a grand adventure.
“As usual I cannot say much, but I have been given a special role as a communications liaison. I am working with the Navy to ensure that their people and my people stay in contact with each other! This is an incredible opportunity, and I am blessed to have it.
“Currently, I am training in Philadelphia, but once we set out from the harbor, I won’t be able to send you any more letters. I can’t tell you where I’m going, but I promise that I’m going to go to amazing places to make you and dad and America proud. I always remember how you used to talk about how Grandmother was a Hello Girl during the Great War, and I think some of that might have rubbed off on me. So, in a way, I have you to thank for this!” [sobs]
JE: “There is no need to worry, I will be fine. They are giving me the best training and I have already learned so much! I wish I could tell you some of the unbelievable things that I’ve seen! You would lose your hat. But I cannot, not even for one million sundaes (ha ha).” It was a joke that we had.
JE: “Also, I am sorry for moving out so soon. I was having a lot of fun with you and it was nice to see you again, it was like the old times when you and Uncle Lyle were staying with us, when he was sick. But those feelings are both good and bad. It was a stressful year for all of us. Edward had just gotten back from the Pacific, and I know that he wasn’t well past the arm, but he inflicted that anger and cruelty on the rest of us and to experience that kind of violence from one’s own brother quickly hollowed the comfort from my childhood home. When I got this job and moved in with you, I thought it would be a fresh start, but it was not meant to happen. I could not shake the painful memories of home. Aunt Jeannie, I am sorry that I was a coward and did not tell you the honest truth. I pray you will forgive me.
I love you,
SG: Oh, Jeanette, I’m so sorry… I’m so sorry…
JE: No, she’s... she’s not a coward. I understand her. I love my family, but…
SG: Yeah, I… I also love my family, but… I’m sorry this didn’t go the way you wanted.
JE: After everything… maybe moving far far away from here is what she needed to do. I… I can respect that.
SG: Do you want… do you want another hug?
JE: Yes, I think so.
[[SFX: Sally embraces Jeanette]
SG: And then I’m getting to the bottom of this.
[[SFX: radio tuning; Sally barges into Tonya's office]]
SG: Come on, LeMartine, what the hell?!
TLM: Now that’s more like what I’d expected from the great Dr. Sally Grissom.
SG: Yeah well, when I try it the nice way I don’t actually get listened to! You’re still deploying Carrie Everworth! I thought we had a deal.
TLM: Actually, what I said was we’d only need fewer volunteers.
SG: We had a deal!
TLM: Sally, do you want me to play the tape back for you? Because you know I can.
SG: Then what fucking gives, lady?
TLM: It was Agent Everworth’s decision. I called her in and explained to her that we could scale back the program. And do you know what she did? She insisted on being one of the select few. And I’m sorry Sally, but even with your improvements to the system we still need volunteers. That’s how this works. We’re not the boogeyman, we don’t snatch people from their cradles.
SG: Not anymore.
TLM: They volunteer, Dr. Grissom. No one is here against their will. They signed up for this job, and they want to do it well. This place runs on good men and women who put themselves before their country. That’s just how it works.
SG: You’re the head of ODAR and you need resources. You fill their heads with propaganda from the jump, of course they volunteer!
TLM: Yes, they’re working for an agency with an agenda. And none of us, not one, is perfect. You want to talk about how fallible I am? I can acknowledge my failures. I’ve made mistakes, I’ve made poor decisions in haste. Hell, I once put out a kill order on you for 1949.
SG: That… that was you?
TLM: Yes. That was me. I saw a quick and dirty way to solve multiple problems at once, problems that had a serious impact on national security. Larger than I’m willing to admit to you presently, I think. But it was foolish and hasty, and I regret it. For whatever it’s worth to you now all these years later, I’m sorry. But I said it to you before and I’ll say it again: just because you’ve lacked a bit of agency with regard to the people who sat in this desk before I did, doesn’t mean Carrie Everworth isn’t exactly where she wants to be. It’s not about you, and it’s not about me. It’s about all of us. Together. Okay?
[[SFX: radio tuning]]
SG: Diary of Sally Grissom, July 13th, 1953. Just got back from Tonya LeMartine’s office. Still not sure what to make of her. She… she admitted to my face that she put out the kill order on me. The one that sent Nikhil Sharma back to me. She just… dropped it. In the middle of a debate. And she still landed her point. For all that Bill Donovan and Hank Cornish had agendas that pushed ODAR into dark territory, there are a lot of dedicated people in ODAR just trying to do the right thing. And it sounds like Carrie Everworth wanted to get away from home. In that sense, you could almost call her deployment… kind.
What the hell kind of woman is that? One who tells you everything up front, and still has the balls to run ODAR the way it’s always been run, from here to 20█? I don’t know if an ODAR that operates with bold-faced honesty is better than before… or worse.
Still. I think… I don’t think I can trust her completely. I’m not gonna invite her to Christmas or anything, but… there’s info that she doesn’t have, and I think she wouldn’t be the absolute worst person to have it. So I think I’m gonna tell her about Partridge’s archive. And maybe if I’m doing it above-board, I can use ODAR resources and actually make some headway with it. Man, this little thing is a tough nut to crack.
[[SFX: displaced air, a creaking floorboard]]
SG: What the–
[[SFX: Someone throws a bag over Sally's head and binds her; she struggles]]
SOVIET AGENT (SA): [RU] Give her the serum!
[[SFX: Another agent sticks her with a needle and injects her with a serum; she continues to struggle, weakening, before losing conscoiusness. One of the agents picks her up and slings her over his shoulder; they make to exit, but:]]
SA: [RU] Turn off the recording device. Let’s go.
[[SFX: one of the agents approaches the recorder to turn it off; tape stop]]
ars PARADOXICA was created by Daniel Manning & Mischa Stanton. Season 3 was also written by Eli Barraza, Julian Mundy, Danielle Shemaiah & Tau Zaman.
Episode 30: Volunteer features –
Kristen DiMercurio (Sally Grissom)
Katie Speed (Esther Roberts)
Tina Huang (Tonya LeMartine)
K McIntyre (Jeanette Everworth)
Laura Faye Smith, Pasha Sol (additional voices)
with special thanks to Isabel Atkinson
Original music by Mischa Stanton and by Eno Freedman-Brodmann.
ars PARADOXICA is brought to you by The Internet: Machines talking to machines talking to machines talking to you.
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